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Para lo que sirve el PhD

The Deep Friar

  • Your can brag to kids who are still in elementary school that you went up to “Grade 23″
  • You and your chiropractor can call each other “fake doctor”.
  • Your friends and family can use your degree against you any time you screw up:  “He has a PhD but he can’t even figure out how to program the remote control!”.
  • Your friends and family can use your degree against you any time you happen to like something low-brow:   “He has a PhD but he likes to watch South Park!“.
  • You can earn a decent salary in a non-research job, but still be considered a failure by your academic peers because you don’t “publish”.
  • If you pursue post-doctoral studies,  you rank slightly higher than lichen on the academic food chain.
  • Those six additional years of graduate school are worth a whole extra $5000 in starting salary.
  • Senior PhD’s will treat you like a junior employee, even though you’re in your 40’s with 10 years work experience.
  • Technicians and blue-collar workers look at you with mistrust, and avoid sitting with you at lunch.
  • The guy with the Grade Nine education who started working at the plant at age 18 will have his house paid off before you even qualify for a mortgage.
  • The guy with the Grade Nine education who started working at the plant at age 18 will be retired with full pension, before you finally get out of debt.
  • You’re still treated like an idiot.   Especially by resentful managers who have less education than you do, who feel they need to prove some kind of point.
  • It’s the only degree that’s sometimes better left unmentionned.   Especially if you’re applying for non-PhD jobs.
  • When someone says “Sometimes there is such a thing as TOO MUCH education“, you know exactly what they mean.
  • You’re well into your 30’s, before you start making the same money as those silly bachelor degrees who started working full-time at age 23.
  • The only person who calls you “Doctor” is the 20-year phoning you up from your old alma mater, asking you to donate money to their latest fundraising drive.
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